Yes, it’s true. I was unemployed for one whole month. After I published my last post, I was in an *intense* interview process for the company I currently work for. I was worried that my erratic and bizarre internet presence would make me an undesirable employee. I had to halt all blog activities immediately.
I wanted to update you all through my journey of adjusting to a new role while reflecting on my past, but I didn’t realize how much of my narrative changed. In my last post, I wanted to come off optimistic and excited for self-discovery. In one month, that was no longer my story.
It’s been a long time since then, and I still don’t have a story. I wanted to explain why meeting Dakota was such a pivotal point in my life, but I feel like I’m giving a lot of credit to someone that doesn’t deserve it. Dakota was cool. He’s definitely the Daisy to my Gastby. He’s influenced some stuff in my life, but he’s not responsible for the woman I choose to be today.
I can’t even tell you who I am either because I’m constantly evolving. The basis of me is pretty simple. I want to love and I want to be loved. For years, I felt ashamed for admitting these feelings to myself. The ashamed feeling came with a lot of guilt. The guilt made me feel like things would be easier if I just hid in my room. Next thing I know, I’m 30.
Past is the past and the future is unknown. You have no idea how long I’ve waited to publish this/ how long it took me to say all of these things.
Thank you guys for joining me today! I’m so happy to have you here!!
~till next time!